Rolling... The New Walking

As I look around our great world, I see so many different beautiful things that we have. I count my blessings every day for things that make our lives easier. I'm so indebted to modern technology that makes me able to get so much more done in such less time than our ancestors from the past.

I love the verity that I have a car so it doesn't take me 17 hours to get from my apartment to school. I’m grateful for the fact that I have a microwave at my fingertips that will brew me up a palatable Cup of Noodles.

I often find myself cursing the microwave in my apartment due to the simple fact that it sucks! I could in all probability heat up a Cup of Noodles faster over an open flame. I then step back and count my blessings that I have one. Let’s be honest, I heard of this place in Africa that has never heard of a microwave. So I guess we can feel good about that.

Now that I've prefaced this with blessings of technology I would now like to cut to the chase. All of this technology is having a first hand affect on the corpulence of our wonderful country.

I would like to hit on one thing in general. Are America’s kids not portly enough as it is? Now we have to add shoes with wheels on them! Are you kidding me?

With so many gaming systems, TV, internet, computer games, and the vast amount of nudie magazines, America’s youth are taking less steps than ever. Now we can add shoes with wheels to the mix of step-depleting factors that the children are partaking in.

Kids seem to be taking fewer steps than ever and now we can minus more steps from the youngins of America. Now they're rolling. They're rolling through halls in school, rolling from store-to-store in the mall, and rolling hearts of members of the opposite sex.

If I were a fourteen year old young lady and saw a boy rolling down the hall at an hasty rate of speed, I admit, I would find myself feeling engrossed by this to cool to walk teen. Don't let it fool you ladies. These trim at purchase boys, are now burning 7000 less calories a day. Give them two months max and they'll be tipping the scales at a slothful 450 lbs.

All I am saying young ones of this country and world, is please consider your purchase of shoes with wheels. I will tell you now that 147 lbs later and a torn ACL you're going to experience a little buyer’s remorse.

Look into some other things to get from point A to point B. You could look into a Segway. You know those things you stand on? They have the two big wheels and stand upright. I know I'm being a charlatan about this one, but at least you look like a BAD A on one of those.

Heaven forbid someone lace up the shoes and stride from one place to another. I avow it won't harm you. It may even aid you. If you don't feel comfortable with this, tape your ankles, wrap your knees and get to steppin.